Separating the past from present.

For an arguably more trivial topic: ever have those moments where you want to watch, read or do something but can't because it reminds you of something or someone else? Every once in a while I'll come across a book or movie, maybe one I haven't seen or don't remember, and absolutely refuse to experience it. Why? Because it reminds me of an aspect of my past that I don't like.

My most recent example is absurdly simple: Harry Potter. Here's the thing, I like the series. Though I never read all of the books, I remember greatly enjoying the ones I had. Though I haven't seen all of the movies, I've likewise enjoyed the ones I've watched. The problem? I want to bring myself to read/watch them again in their entirety but can't. Every time I think about watching the movies, I am reminded of a girl I used to date. And that thought alone keeps me from watching them again.

What I find strange, though, is that I don't regret the memories I have with that person, nor do I "hate" her in any regard. In fact, she isn't someone I've thought or cared about in years. For whatever reason, though, those memories are just ones that I do not wish to be reminded of. I definitely wasn't as happy with my life back then as I am now, so maybe I'm just afraid to remember what I was like back then? Or maybe I just don't want to catch myself thinking about a person not in my life anymore? I'm not sure, but I do know that my case isn't necessarily isolated. Occasionally I'll talk to a friend who will give the same excuse for not wanting to watch or read something I've suggested to them; either it reminds them of a time in their life in which they were unhappy, or it reminds them of someone they'd rather not think about.

In my case, the thought has crossed my mind that if I were to watch the movies again, freshly, I would create a new experience separate from my past. Even still, I wonder what causes such strange reactions within people; how seemingly irrelevant or outdated memories can have such powerful impacts on the present. How many things in my life will I miss out on because an aspect of my past dissuades me from experiencing them?